Is it Highway Robbery For The Parents To keep The Bar Mitzvahs Gifts To Pay Off The Caterer?


I was Bar Mitzvaded in April of 1962, like many Bar Mitzvah boys I studied my Tuchas off for 6 hrs a day of learning to sing the Haf Torah and all the trimmings.I was ever bit as good a a young Moisher Oysher I was home schooled by my Great Uncle Phil Silver who happed to  grew up with Moisher Oysher and went to the same Shull in Montreal with him… His  younger Brother Daniel Silver Himself was a Famous Big Time Chassan from Montreal.
       My parents like many Parents in the 50′s and 60′s wanted to impress everyone so they rented a catering hall that they couldn’t afford.Each and every Bar Mitsvah boys mother would put on her mink stole  and utter the words Hoo- Ha look at me while feining wealth as they lined their pockets with all the gift money indeed for their son .How in the world can they pay for it you might ask? Simple..  They kept all the Cash Gifts and Bonds  and basically handed it over to the catering Hall ..If they wanted to throw a big affair Guess What? They  should have saved up & used their own money or taken out a loan at the bank. Those gifts did belong to them..Shame on all of those Parents who spoiled their sons Big Day.

Actual Reception 1962 Howard Ave.Brownsville Brooklyn 

Every Jewish man in my age bracket knows what I’m referring to. It s just not right.I tell everyone who  is not Jewish that if their invited to a Bar mitzvahs to ask the father of the Bar Mitzvah Boy “Are you letting the Bar Mitsvah Boy keep all of the Gifts”? If they say no… then I don’t go because the parents are making a shame out of a sacred act.Today all lot of Parents when asked that replying back “where saving it for his college education” Wrong answer that money is your son’s to so as he pleases him whether it be Atlantic city casino or anything he bloody well chooses.

My parents and all those who stole their kid’s Bar Mitvah gelt Fashaired our Simchca. Sad to say  keeping all cash gifts and bonds was business as usual for that entire Generation of Jewish Parents.

Write us at The Lerman Report and tell us your experience on this subject , we’d like to hear from you

One comment on “Is it Highway Robbery For The Parents To keep The Bar Mitzvahs Gifts To Pay Off The Caterer?

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